In a Humour

Here's what's funny to me:

A little snack shop I saw in Pennsylvania whose sign said simply "Live Bait Hoagies".

Politicians who chant the dual mantras "We must stop government interference" and "We desperately care about who you sleep with and marry."

Ameritech. A couple of years ago at work, our phone system was down. After several hours and numerous cell phone calls to locate the damn repair truck, I finally got to talk to the tech....and he told me that he had tried to verify our problem, but when he called us at our work number, no one answered. So he closed the call. Gosh, why do you suppose we didn't answer, Mr. Hawkings?

I received spam yesterday offering "Increased bustline. For gals."

"Live Nude Dancers".

Hair on my chest only after it left my head.

Playing five tickets in the lotto, because a 5/200,000,000 chance is so much better than a 1/200,000,000 chance.

"I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury."
"Why should I care about posterity? What's posterity ever done for me?"
"A man's only as old as the woman he feels. "
"Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read. "

This last, I'm particularly fond of.